you’re a peter, not a dancer!

brown mary lives in a foreign land. brown as dirt and so indian that every firang who meets her says, “oh i lurvvve india; all those colors and the dancing”. pavlov has nothing on mary.

in the hope of developing dancing skills other than hip-shutting the refrigerator, indian mary has been attempting the argentine tango.

but wait, this is about peter.

so mary went to tango. the male tango demographic in the city that she lives is surprisingly, ahem, well, ancient. except for the instructors who are young and hot. and come pre-hooked. anyway, the age factor is great though, because when dancing, mary wants to learn how to dance and not dodge peter’s moves: the “let me show you how it’s done to creepy music in the background” moves. the older gentlemen contrary to popular opinion are most proper and sweet.

the way these delightful classes work are a round-robin system where people switch partners throughout class. and then there are practice sessions over the weekend where you ask / asked to dance by people who have come to practice as well.

all good so far?

so mary went to a practice session one bright, sunny saturday afternoon. in the sea of brilliant bleached white brightening the sunny floor, she spotted another kindred brown visage.

peter!!!

brown has only two reactions to brown in the phoren land; repel or attract. nothing in-between. mary wants to find out where her dispositions lie.

man: check
brown: check
dancing the tango: check

mary makes eye contact. peter hones in on mary and asks her to dance.

astor piazzola’s libertango

stretch, stretch, walk.

in close quarters, mary realizes that peter is (a) shorter than mary, (b) podgy, (c) a bad dancer.

she continues dancing and ignores all warning signals in the head. one must be tolerant. if peter steps on one foot, show him the other.

peter: what’s your name?

mary: mary

peter: i am vipul

mary: (shah? patel?)

keeps dancing. all conversation stems. mary is trying to catch the music, while peter tries equally hard to evade it.

two minute silence in mourning of the possibly perfect tango partnership later;

peter:  i am going to the temple this weekend, want to go?

mary: (huh? sorry? did I hear you right? is sooraj barjatya hiding somewhere? WHAT?)

mary stares goggle-eyed and mary has big eyes.

peter: i was thinking of going sunday afternoon.

mary: er, not really no, i am sorry, i am not very religious.

peter: hehehe, i am leetle bit, but actually they have good food and it’s free.

mary: (kill me kill me now!) uh I still don’t think so, and i have to take a break now. 

the music stops. mary is now in search of an international tango partner. peter fasts weekdays, eats weekends and is bidding for a detachable camel hump on ebay. 

this note to peter is by guest counsellor mathangi krishnamurthy whom you can hook up with at 'la chaim'!


image credit: www.youngloverslabel.com